There are Demons in my head

I often have people attend a course who tell me that they have demons in their head.

To some people this might seem a little crazy; however I can fully understand what they mean.

I had many demons in my own head and was often desperate to find a way to remove them.

The demons would ask me certain questions such as what if questions:

What if you lose your job?
What if your girlfriend dumps you?
What if no one likes you?

There were many other questions as well, all aimed at making me worry, stress or become paranoid.

For many many years they succeeded in their aims. I did worry far too much, I was depressed and I certainly was not the happiest person on the planet.

Aged twenty-two, I decided to wage war on these inner demons; it was a war I could not afford to lose.

What I decided to do was to talk back to these demons, but not to just say the words, I also had to mean and believe in them.

What if you lose your job? I will deal with this if or when it happens Mr Demon, and not a minute before.

I am working hard and trying my best at work and therefore believe that it is unlikely that I will lose my job.

I am however confident of finding another position if it does occur.

This was a long battle but one which I did eventually win.

Gain confidence by waging war on your inner demons

Here is an article that I have recently written with regards to my demons:

I am a person who used to be a very negative thinker; I would always believe that I would fail in whichever task I was attempting to do.

I have to say that I did not really like myself and seemed to be constantly down and depressed.

I have managed however, to turn my life around and will explain in this article how I managed to do this.

As I was growing up through childhood into adulthood I felt that I was rather unlucky. I had a speech impediment (a stutter/stammer), a bald patch on my head which was the size of a ten pence piece, I constantly struggled with my weight (I was basically fat) and I am quite short for a male at five foot five.

I looked at other people in my community, especially my friends and felt very jealous of them. I would often think and ask myself why I had so many issues to deal with.

The problems in life which I had, especially the speech impediment seriously dented my confidence and I became a bit of a loner. I felt uncomfortable mixing in groups and always believed that people were laughing behind my back and talking about me.

I had an inner voice which I call my demons. They would be constantly talking to me, advising me to avoid situations and to avoid taking on tasks which they said were beyond me.

They made me feel very stupid and worthless. I would listen to these demons and would basically do or not do as the case may be, whatever they told me to.

I agreed with them, that I was not good enough or able to take on those certain tasks. I often wondered what life would be like if only I get these horrible gremlins out of my head.

I was not happy with where my life was heading or how it had been in the past. I wanted to be successful, confident and free from these demons.

At the age of twenty-two I decided to wage a war on these demons, a war I was determined to win. I started to read many books on self-confidence, thinking positive and mind over matter.

Progress was not exactly quick and it took me many months to start to make any headway.

I needed to basically think more positive, be more assertive, and far more care-free. I learnt that in life all you can do is to try your best.

Life is very short and can end at any point; therefore I need to make the most of it, live life to the full and not as a scared rabbit, which is what I had been doing.

Stressing or worrying about a situation makes it harder not easier, therefore why do I do it?

These are all easy to say and write, however are extremely hard to implement.

Implement I must, I thought. During my war, there were many battles with these horrible demons, some of which I certainly lost.

I kept on talking to the demons telling them that they may have won the battle but that they will not win the war.

I did eventually win my war after quite a long period of time. I now like myself and am pleased to report that I have also overcome the speech impediment.

The main lesson that I learnt is to do the opposite of what the demons tell you to.

They are the devil and therefore we have to stop listening to them.

You are the most depressive person that I have ever met

I was aware that I was not the most happy, positive or confident of people but I was of the belief that I was just one of many people who had problems and that the way I was thinking was basically normal.

It therefore came as quite a shock to me when a colleague of mine stated that I was the most depressive person that he had ever met.

I was just twenty-one at the time and my colleague was in his fifties.

This is how the conversation continued:

“Am I, why?”

“You are always moaning about something, you are very negative, you rarely smile and you walk around like you have the weight of the world’s problems on your shoulders.

I have to admit that I used to be a bit like you are, however I was then given some advice that I will now repeat to you.

When you start to feel down and depressed, read the local and national newspapers, even watch the news on the television.

By doing this you will hear about many stories from around the world, such as earthquakes, floods, wars, car crashes and many other tragic events.

This should soon help you to realise that you are in fact one of the lucky ones and may help you to be more appreciative of what you do have in life, rather than always concentrating on what you have not.”

I have to say that this advice has proven to be invaluable for me. I had never really been interested in the news before this conversation however I now purchase at least one newspaper every day.

gain more confidence page 4